Rosalind Wiseman

Family Circle: Ask Rosalind, June 2008

Q. Our kids aren’t allowed on the phone after 9 p.m., but my 12-year-old daughter keeps getting calls from one boy as late as 12:30. How can we get him to stop? A. On the off chance this boy is using your land line, keep the phone close by. When he calls, answer in your [...]

Family Circle: Ask Rosalind, June 2008

Q. Our kids aren’t allowed on the phone after 9 p.m., but my 12-year-old daughter keeps getting calls from one boy as late as 12:30. How can we get him to stop?

A. On the off chance this boy is using your land line, keep the phone close by. When he calls, answer in your most intimidating parent way (meaning, don’t threaten him but be very clear that he can’t call after 9). If he’s reaching your daughter on her cell, then she needs to surrender it to you (which, by the way, all teens should do when they go to bed). If her phone rings, answer it exactly the way I advised if he were calling the house. Be strict with this rule now, and you’ll save yourself a lot of headaches as your kids get older — by, say, intercepting that after-hours text message about the unsupervised party down the block.

Family Circle: Ask Rosalind, May 2008

Q. My 15-year-old refuses to go on vacation with us unless we take her friend. We like the girl, but we really just wanted to go away as a family. What should we do? A. A 15-year-old has the right to request that a friend join you, but she doesn’t get to make the ultimate [...]

Family Circle: Ask Rosalind, May 2008

Q. My 15-year-old refuses to go on vacation with us unless we take her friend. We like the girl, but we really just wanted to go away as a family. What should we do?

A. A 15-year-old has the right to request that a friend join you, but she doesn’t get to make the ultimate decision. That said, when I was growing up we often vacationed with other families who had kids my age, with a few days set aside for family time only. Even during my most difficult teen years I looked forward to those vacations because of the time I’d spend around the people I loved. So if it’s logistically possible, I’d compromise and have the friend join you for part of the time. Or plan a weekend getaway and invite her then.

Family Circle: Ask Rosalind, April 2008

Q. My 12-year-old daughter often asks me for notes to get her out of gym class. She has asthma, but it’s well controlled. I think she’s using it as an excuse. How should I handle this? A. Sounds to me like you’re right. But your daughter probably believes she has a good reason — maybe [...]