Rosalind Wiseman

One of my best and worst characteristics is that when someone asks me if I can do something I’ve never done before, my response is almost always, “Sure. What’s the worst thing that would happen?” So when Penguin Putnam asked me if I could write a novel for teens, I said, “Why not? I have thousands of stories in my head about teens. How hard could it be to string them all together and come up with some kind of a plot?”

Let me tell you now: IT WAS VERY HARD!

In the last two years I have had countless opportunities to curse the moment I agreed to write this novel. I have wanted to give up so many times I’ve lost track. I never felt so completely incompetent. But I now believe entirely in the saying, “That which does not kill me makes me stronger.” So for all of you would-be writers out there, here are a few behind-the-scenes highlights from my debut as a novelist:

• I wrote approximately 1000 pages—of which 300 remain. By the way, I was told by my editor, Stacey Barney, to stop counting because it would drive me insane.
• I wrote 120 pages of backstory—which was unfortunate because I didn’t know what the term backstory was at the time, and I didn’t realize that it always ends up on the cutting room floor. 
• When I would get edits back on drafts one through twenty, for the first time in my life, I would would hate my editor, want to give up, and resent that I ever agreed to do this.When I still got back huge edits after I had handed in my 40th draft, I wanted to throw the manuscript through the window.
• I never had writer’s block–in fact, it was quite the opposite. I had all of these stories kids have told me over the years battling in my head. It was like having a group of 6th graders in a class and they are all raising their hands frantically to be called on—and in a real life classroom when that happens it totally stresses me out. With so many story possibilities at times it was almost impossible to make a decision.
• I experienced overwhelming fear that my writing was so bad, I could never show anything I’d written to any teen without losing any shred of respect they had for me. To get over this fear, I subjected myself to a colleague’s Creative Writing class where the students read a chapter a week and then graded me on it. This might be one of the bravest things I’ve ever done.
• All of my ideas for titles were shot down. And I had some great titles, by the way. So now I have to write another book called “Crushed.”

For all of this, I had moments during its creation that brought me the most joy I’ve ever had writing. The fiction process is so much different from everything else I’ve done, but it allowed me to create characters that I really love and put them in all sorts of situations I think my readers will really relate to.

It’s hard to believe but I should be completely absolutely done in a week, and that in January 2010 I will actually be able to hold the finished product in my hands and share it with all of you. Yes, it’s my fourth book, but I feel like I can finally say without a doubt that I am a writer. And I may just be insane enough to do it again.